U.S. Government Breaches Guy Code

Today I was shocked and appalled by the actions of our government.  I’m more than happy with the Osama Bin Laden raid. I don’t mind shooting the f**ker in the head and throwing him in the ocean.  I don’t even mind storming into a sovereign country like Pakistan to go get him.  I mean who cares if we piss off Pakistan?  However what I read this morning was truly disturbing.  Apparently we have found Bin Laden’s porno stash and have it in our custody.  Not only that but they’ve decided to tell everyone about it.  Sorry but that’s just not cool and it’s a total breach of guy code.  If at any point you were to some how stumble upon another dude’s porno stash you simply act like you never saw it.  Everyone knows that.  You don’t say anything about it and you certainly don’t go to the media about it.  Unless it’s some kind of child porn, no matter how weird or kinky it may be, you just don’t talk about it.  If your buddy is into over weight midget porn than so be it.  To each his own.  Shame on you United States government for telling everyone that Bin Laden had a porno stash.  I know what you’re probably thinking “But the people who died on 9/11 can’t view their porno stash”.  That’s true but after all the brave men and women died on 9/11 Osama Bin Laden didn’t find their porn and tell everyone about it.  Now that we know Bin Laden was a porno dude I do wonder what exactly he was into.  Did he just watch the standard straight stuff?  Was he into some kind of Muslim porn?  Is there Muslim porn? If so do they keep their burkas on?  There’s porn for everything so I’m guessing there has to be Muslim porn.  I wonder if he was a boob guy.  Something tells me he wasn’t breast fed as a child so maybe he’s a booty man.  Maybe he was into some really kinky bondage stuff.  I just hope when I die no one broadcasts my porno stash.  For the record I don’t confirm nor deny that I’ve ever even seen a porno.  I also won’t confirm that I have a thing for chicks wearing glasses.  Is that weird? If so then I’m joking of course.

I think we know what he was watching on TV and why he had the blanket wrapped around him.