Phew! Â OK everyone you all can relax now. Â Roger Goodell, the commissioner of the NFL, does not do steroids. Â Surprised? Â Mean either. Â For some reason Roger Goodell subjected himself to a surprise test for HGH. Â He wants to include testing in the next collective bargaining agreement. Â What this proves though no one really knows. Â Especially since we’re not even sure what the results were. Â When asked how the test turned out Goodell replied “I can’t disclose it because of the confidential nature of it. Let me put it this way: I’m proud of my results”. Â Actually Roger you can absolutely disclose it I mean just say it. Â You’re not a player so even if you did test positive you can hold a press conference and tell everyone and nothing would probably happen to you. Â Also what exactly are you proud of? Â Really you’re proud of passing a drug test? Â That’d be like if I went to the Doctor and was proud of the fact I didn’t have VD. Â How can you be proud of a test result when you knew what the outcome would be? Â I think it’s time to say that Roger Goodell is a complete moron.
Just took a breathalizer and I am proud of the results although I can’t disclose what they were.