Phew! OK everyone you all can relax now. Roger Goodell, the commissioner of the NFL, does not do steroids. Surprised? Mean either. For some reason Roger Goodell subjected himself to a surprise test for HGH. He wants to include testing in the next collective bargaining agreement. What this proves though no one really knows. Especially since we’re not even sure what the results were. When asked how the test turned out Goodell replied “I can’t disclose it because of the confidential nature of it. Let me put it this way: I’m proud of my results”. Actually Roger you can absolutely disclose it I mean just say it. You’re not a player so even if you did test positive you can hold a press conference and tell everyone and nothing would probably happen to you. Also what exactly are you proud of? Really you’re proud of passing a drug test? That’d be like if I went to the Doctor and was proud of the fact I didn’t have VD. How can you be proud of a test result when you knew what the outcome would be? I think it’s time to say that Roger Goodell is a complete moron.
Just took a breathalizer and I am proud of the results although I can’t disclose what they were.